This post is not sponsored. I intentionally did not edit or ask any grammar nazis to review this post, because I wanted it to sound the same as if I was telling the story. No suspects were harmed by me. Names have not been changed. The following is my account of events on March 20, 2014 at RodeoHouston. Also, the first photo is blurry, but the photo bomb was hysterical!
Last Thursday, I made a major decision. Okay, so major to me, that is. I decided to leave my Nikon DSLR at home, and enjoy Blake Shelton girls night out at RodeoHouston, without anything work related. My mission: living life in the moment. Translation, enjoy the night without blogging about it. No photos. No tweeting, instagramming, four squaring involved. Yes, I realize I am making up words, its my prerogative….bwhahhaha
Then, why am I writing about my night? Blame it on my big mouth. I was sharing my accidental adventures with some new blogger friends in Louisville, and they were like “You should blog about it.” Now, let’s see if my writing is as funny as my storytelling.
Here’s what happened: Myself and three friends met at Reliant Stadium, all set to drool over Blake Shelton and drink some Miller Lite. I’d won action seats in the Miller Lite section, so we were six rows from the livestock, cowboys and action. But before the night was over, I was sitting closer to the “action” than I would have guessed. And, I don’t mean the bull riding!
Apparently, the four old guys sitting next to us, and by us, I mean “me”, thought they won the lottery when we sat down. Of course, I was the lucky one that got to sit next to suspects 1-4. After giving me the up and down, aka undressing me with his half closed, alcohol influenced eyes, he insisted on a fist bump….with all four of us.
Then he told me his life story, well just the highlights I guess: his first time at RodeoHouston in seven years; couldn’t believe he was sitting next to four babes; look at how close we are to the dirt; and how he HAD to take a photo with us to show his friends at work! Guess, I should count my blessings, he forgot about the photo idea!
Dude had definitely been over served. I literally laughed when he returned from a bar run, and asked if I drank his Coors Light. Um, you mean the empty one, you left in my cup holder? I held back and didn’t give him the 50 reasons I wouldn’t touch his beer or anything else. And of course I was excited to see him return, this time with a shot of liquor and a full beer. Lucky me, I shouted to myself! My friends, sitting next to me, started asking how I was getting along with my new buds. Did they really expect an answer?
But wait (in my best infomerical voice) it gets better! During the National anthem, suspect #2 broke his folding chair. Yep, broke it. Everyone else in the stadium is being quiet and respectful and this dude is making more racket than the other 75,000 people. Keep in mind, that even after this incident, I was a little surprised when he spilled his Shiner Bock on me. (In fairness, I’d told my friend by the end of the night I bet I’ll be wearing some of suspect #1’s beer) I guess my psychic powers still need work! Oh and who drinks Shiner, when sitting in Miller Lite seats?!?
I actually wasn’t too upset to be wearing beer. Some people around us in lower rows, were wearing dirt and poop, kicked up by the horses. So, all in all, beer was the better option. But I had to discourage suspect #2 from drying off my arm and jeans, so I thought I’d distract him by asking, “where’s my beer?” Bad move. He then insists and I mean INSISTS I take a “chug”, his word not mine, of his beer. I’m trying to sing along with Blake Shelton, and he’s like a mosquito in my ear. Finally, I caved and took a “chug”, because I just wanted to enjoy the concert. Of course, my friend witnesses the embarrassing moment, and says “OMG. You just chugged a creepy guy’s beer.”
And this is just one of the many examples of how adventure always seems to find me. Also, how I have strange luck. Like, why couldn’t I have been sitting next to four smokin’ hot cowboys in tight jeans?
P.S. If I’d been in “work mode” I might have taken some great photos of Blake Shelton, and Miranda Lambert…and cute cowboys. All photos were taken with my HTC One Max!